Be Obsessed or Be Average by Grant Cardone (lessons to take from)

Grant Cardone, the owner of 5 privately held companies with sales of $100 million a year, is one of the ten most influential CEOs in the world, a father of two girls and a contributing member of the society.


As a descendant of Italian immigrants, he was raised in a family of three children that was doing very well, where his dad had started up a little grocery store, then, an insurance company, but drastically the company didn’t pull off. As driven as a human being can be to complete the mission of supporting his family, and let them live happily, his dad never slacked off, started over and got himself a license as a stockbroker. His new career treated him exceptionally well, he successfully got his family in to the middle class.

But…it didn’t last long. Due to a serious heart condition, his father died at the age of forty-two when Grant was ten. With the money left, his mom had to make do with the little amount and stretch it out long and get all five kids into college.

As time went by, this big house had to be put on sale, from that time on, Grant’s teenage years took a dive. Though he was not grateful with what he had, though he wanted to get rich, and to never be worried about affording basic necessities again, he was obsessed with the wrong things. By the time, he graduated, Grant was addicted to drugs. His mom refused to meet him any longer, so he forced himself to go to rehabilitation treatment center. After the 29 days at the facility, while walking out the door exiting the center, he was greeted by his counselor who said to him,

“You’ll never make it. You are a defective person. You have an addictive personality. You have a disease you can never recover from. The most successful thing you can do with your life at this point is never to use drugs again.”

From that moment on, he never got back into drugs. He dedicated on putting 100% into re-bouncing his life to be a successful sales man. His self-esteem was returned and he was again OBSESSED, not with drugs, but with SUCCESS. This obsession with work had gotten to the point that his family was worried about his well being. People were disapproving his drive.

Despite what others say to him, he realized that obsession is gift.

The next time someone starts labelling your obsession an illness, tell them , “I’m not afflicted, I’m gifted.”

To have what you want in life, you must give yourself permission to throw yourself all in on your dreams. Make it clear to others that you are obsessed and that, though you would like their support, any expectations they may have of your staying where you are, settling for less than you  dream, being average will have to take a backseat.

The obsessed embrace that the fact that they and on they- are responsible for their success.

Success is about being great at many things.

You can have it all: health, wealth, family, love, recreation, spirituality, cominty and eime to enjoy it all.

Why settle for one color when you can have the rainbow?

To find your inner obsession freak, ask yourself these questions:

  • Secretly or publicly, have you always wanted to do unbelievable things?
  • Do you dream of doing something that will make the entire world stand up and take notice?
  • Have you considered what it would be like if you became a household name? Or wondered what it would be like to be famous?
  • Would you like your name to be synonymous with a breakthrough that changed the world for the better?
  • Would you love to walk into the crowded room and have everyone know your name?
  • Have you ever imagined what it would be like to fly in a private jet or own your own?

If you did answer yes to most of this, then, you have to read this summary and the book.

You deserve massive success so abundant it cant be disrupted , taken away, diminished, or stolen.

Those who suggest you should settle for less than your potential are doing so because  they are trying to make sense of a decision to settle for less in their own lives.

Prepare yourself: when you commit to this obsessed thing, you will be labeled an outlier, a freak, and a weirdo. Remind yourself you arent the problem. The problem is the we’ve living in.


The average set their goals and devote to just get by, they ignore their ability to thrive for true success.

The average fail to achieve real freedom, and will in time live a life of fear and constant worry.

You are the composite of the five people you spend the most time with. Look around: If the people you see aren’t screaming success, they are validating average.

No matter how much concern or love another person has for you, they don’t have your dreams. Those belong to youand they make you unique.

It makes no difference how much another person love or care for you, they don’t have your dream. Your dreams are yours and they make you unique.

Average people including your friends, family, employees and colleagues-will tell you things like:

  • Slow down
  • Life is to be enjoyed
  • Don’t work too much
  • Don’t work too hard
  • Take it wasy
  • Be grateful-someone else is owrse off than you
  • Life is short
  •  money isnt everthing
  • Bigger is better

Brainwashed by the wisdom of work-life balance, blending in, adapting, and fairness and equality for all, will do whatever they can to come up with reasons why you should give up your dream, and obsession.

Ask them if they can justify their obsession with comfort with being normal, having no purpose or drive?


In every of our waking hour, we are showered with distractions, lies, political agendas, crises, terror and false hopes, which are not only useless for contribution to our goals, but they make people believe that they are powerless in control their own destiny.


  • Scrolling social media for hours, and dazzled by the news with mindless content and negativity. With all these unnecessary distractions splashing on you 24/7, your chance of success is thin.
  • Taking advice from a quitter. Anyone who quit improving themselves, being short of their potential.


  • Break out of the average cycle.
  • Average is a failing formula and it works for no one.
  • Live above the average line.
  • Be all in and obsessed.

People who had proven that obsession works:

” I want to put a dent in the universe”~ Steve Jobs

“I have a dream….” ~ Martin Luther King Jr.

“Be the change you want to see in the world.” ~ Gandhi 

” Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces smart people into thinking they can’t lose.” ~ Bill Gates

“I am the greatest.” ~ Muhammad Ali

Obsession was their main drive. They go far beyond any average person in doing what it takes to make their dreams reality. Each of them created a legacy that will live on for centuries.

Their name inspires and will inspire hundreds of million of people to consider what it means to be great.

However, it takes more than desire to be great, it requires sweat, blood, tears, and put yourself on the edge on any chance that you get to.

There is no such thing as part-time obsession. “Sometimes obsessed” or “only obsessed on weekends” or “obsessed between the hours of 8:00 a.m and 5:00 p.m.” is a fantasy. You have to embrace this die-trying mentality.


Purpose is the holy grail of the obsessed. It is the reason for doing anything, the reason for existence. It is the fuel of your obsessions.

As soon as you find your purpose and distinguish the things that are worthy of obsessions, remember that you don’t need to love your job or even do what you are passionate about to get obsessed enough to be sucessful.


Ask yourself these questions and answer them with the first response that comes to you, and slowly you will notice that the same answer keeps coming up. You may find out that you have a dream that you never thought you’d still have it.

Personal Interest

  • What excites me now?
  • What is so exciting to me that I would do anything to accomplish it?
  • What bores me?
  • What is the thing things I have always wanted to do?
  • What don’t I want to do, no matter the payoff?
  • What do I do that causes me to forget to eat?
  • What have I been interested in since childhood?

Money Motivation

  • What am I willing to do for no money?
  • What would I like to do for a lot of money?
  • If money had nothing to do with my life, what would I do with my time?
  • What amount of money would give the security I need?
  • What amount of money would I need to have choice?
  • What amount of money would I need to have financial freedom?
  • What amount of money would I need to really make a difference for the better?

Skills and Talents

  • What can I do better than anyone?
  • What are some of my native skills?
  • What have I always been good at?
  • What have I always been bad at?
  • What skills or talents do I have that I ignore?
  • What am I terrible at and should not be doing at all?
  • What do I do that is a complete waste of my time and talent?
  • In what areas do others think more of my abilities than I do?
  • What are the skills I need to develop?

Market Research

  • What is a product or service that I have complained about repeatedly?
  • What great idea have I had for starting a company or inventing something that I havent followed through on?


  • What do I want to be remembered for?
  • What contributions can I make to society that I would be most proud of?
  • What do I want to make sure people never say about me?

Inspiring People

  • Who are five successful people I admire?
  • What are those people doing that I admire?
  • What do those I admire have in common with one another?
  • What quality do I wish I shared with those people?
  • What do I have in common with that list of people?
  • If I could meet anyone, who would it be?
  • Who is the most people supportive people in my life?


  • What makes me feel good?
  • What gives me energy?
  • What activity bores me and doesn’t make me feel good?
  • What things am I doing that I regret later?
  • What bad habits do I need to stop?
  • What good habits do I need to start?
  • What do I need to do more of that would make me feel better about myself?

What if….

  • If I were going to write a book, what would it be about? What inspiration lessons would I draw from my life?
  • If I knew I couldn’t fail, what would I do?
  • If I could be known for one great thing, what would I want it to be?

You fill find out what makes your life complete. Stop your denial and self-belittle that are pulling you back from going forward. Allow yourself to get obsessed.

Feed the beast

What you pay attention to is what you get. The more attention you give to something, the more you feed it.

It is crucial you pay attention to the things and people who fuel and support your obsessions, and steer away from the things and people who don’t.

Don’t write your goals on a post it note and look at them once a while. Eat, sleep and breathe your goal.

Always stay focused on your goals, never lose yourself in the noise of your mind or whatever that’s happening in the world.

Wake up and go to sleep with your goal.

Starve the doubt

Doubt is your biggest threat and therefore, your biggest enemy.

As cliché as it sounds, nothing is impossible. You need to master your obsession into an energized momentum for the success you desire. Fill your obsession with the highest-octane stuff you can get your hands on.

I will judge myself less for coming up short than never going for it.

that is like the dreamkiller people are so filled with doubt They are unable to believe in themselves enough to become Obsessed with their own success Instead they let their fear Lead the way

Do not let fear lead your way, as it is the most dangerous form of terrorism on this planet.

If you are the most successful person in the room you are in the wrong room.

Haters and naysayers

If you expect yourself to be successful, then expect to encounter those who are going to be critical envious and worse, those who drive doubt.

The world is filled with people who have given up on their dreams and now spent their lives trying to get others to give up on theirs.

However, there is little to be concerned if critics are just people who envy you, but unfortunately they also include people who love and care for you. But do not forget that naysayers are protecting themselves from being pointed out that they gave in into living average lives. You doing something big will challenge their ego, and confidence.

They would not hesitate to overwhelm you with doubt and confusion to your already challenging goals, and it will your journey more struggling.

While the haters are hating. The obsessed are creating.

Steer clear of the doubters and stay on track. 

Massive success is the ultimate revenge to haters.

Dominate to win

Learn to control your thinking your actions and your choices it’s a bad idea to ignore your inventions your energy and your obsessions even worse to let them take your own their own course through domination intro up session starts with dominating yourself not others

Start by dominating yourself, not others, control your thoughts, your actions and your choices.

Avoiding feeling confused and overwhelmed with too many choices.

Set rules, limit, break down and analyze each area of your life so that you can fully dominate those that most matter to you. Turn them to vital fuel for your obsessions.

Stay Dangerous

Fear is an indication of what you should do, not what you shouldn’t do.

Do you obsessed life is about constantly moving in the direction of your fears and possibilities be up SAST with danger and discomfort commit yourself to this feeling of discomfort to see how committed you are to your success assess how dangerous you are the six exercise

Commit yourself to the feeling of discomfort to see how commited you are to your success.

Be a control freak

The only people do don’t like control are those who don’t have control or who misused it in the past.

A successful person is willing to overlook the authority to do the right thing and is more dangerous than the bad guys.

Control vs. Deadership

When it comes to leadership style, it doesn’t matter. What you want is control. What’s important is that things don’t go wrong.

Don’t care about the label, care about whether you have the power to determine, predict and influence results.

All true leaders are willing to take control. It takes guts to stand up and exert control over their environments, their people and their futures.

If you want to break out of the average, ASSUME CONTROL.

People who gave up on control have given control a bad name, and left it to be criticized.

The people who complain about control are the same people who refuse to exert control over their environment and then resent their environment.

Everyday you and I are given an opportunity to control our own environment.

So many shy away from taking charge, they prefer to sit in the backseat and tell you that you missed the turn when it’s too late.

Don’t wait for someone to give you control.

You don’t have to be given responsibility or promoted to a leadership position to exert control.

If you see an obvious problem and you’ve got a solution, its your responsibility to exert control, to step up and lead. Declare: “I got this”. As the old saying goes, its easier to ask for forgiveness than permission.

Believing in everything you do, and you don’t, get trained until you have complete confidence and competence in whatever you do.


One of the great ingredients for success is persistence.

Here are some examples of people who persisted longer than anyone thought reasonable:

  • Walt Disney was turned down for financing 302 times. His first animation went bankrupt
  • Stephen king’s first book Carrie was rejected thirty times. He even threw the manuscript in the trash
  • Oprah winfrey was told she unfit for television
  • Fred Astaire was told during his first screen test, “cant act. Can’t sing. Slight bald”
  • Lady Gaga’s first record deal was dropped after just one month
  • How Schultz’s employer had no interest in his coffee idea and sold him the branch name “Starbucks”
  • Steven Spielberg was rejected from film school three times
  • Bill gates dropped out of Harvard and his fist company went no where
  • Henry ford’s first two car companies failed and left him broke
  • Mark Cuban failed as a carpenter, a waiter and a cook.

You don’t need to be comforted when things don’t turn out right. Sympathy is not what you need. Comfort doesn’t pay the bills. Because, as I’ve emphasized in other chapters, you are at your best when you’re outside your comfort zone, pushing yourself and pushing limits to make the impossible possible.

The super successful don’t just overcome their failures-they use them as fuel to persist.

The difference between success and failure is staying in the game when others are giving up.

It is impossible to live without failing at something, unless you live so cautiously that you might as well not have lived at all–in which case you fail by default. ~ J.K. Rowling

Here are some ways to exercise your persistence muscle:

  • Complete every task, finish everything you start, and stop walking away from unfinished projects in your professional and personal life.
  • When you hit the wall, don’t focus on the obstacle. Look for creative ways to take another run at it.
  • Expect others to quit; while persistence begins and ends with you, be prepared for people around you quit and try to persuade you to do the same.
  • Use yesterday’s successes as fuel for persisting today. But don’t get stuck in them. Instead, stay interested in the next success and the one after that.
  • Stay busy generating interest or income or learning something–doing things that help you keep going– because a rolling stone gathers no moss.
  • Never settle, never be satisfied with your triumphs, and instead use them as fuel to move you further toward your full potential.

When all the average people would never continue, put one foot infront of the other and refuse to back down, knowing that when you quit, you will have to start over again. Those who are truly obsessed are willing to persist when it no longer makes sense.

Get it done, then get it right

Perfectionism is just a fancy word for not getting started.

Persist and one day you will perfect.

When clarifying what you should be obsessed with, the following should be true:

  1. It improves the outcome of your life and others’ life
  2. It moves you to reveal more of your potential

Some other great questions to ask:

  • Who am I doing this for
  • How many will benefit from this
  • Whats going to keep me fueled to do more?
  • What if anything were possible?
  • When I accomplish this, what is next
  • What am I doing that is not purpose driven?
  • What else am I capable of doing that I havent done
  • What have I always wanted to do that I have forgotten about
  • Are those around me on the same page?
  • Who is encouraging me to live a life of purpose?
  • Who is a good role model for what I am attempting?
  • Who around me is not living a life of purpose?
  • What can I do to help other achieve their purposes?

Don’t become complacent with our victories and keep our attention on our possibilities.

Obsession hacks

  • Reach up for new friends: whatever you have to do to make new friends and new connections, just make sure you are reaching up-not sideways and not down. Don’t just be friends with ta banker in your town-make sure you know the most successful banker in your town, and the most successful lawyer, the most successful insurance guy, the most successful businessperson, the politically connected. And then keep reaching up.
  • Leave your home and join new clubs. Get involved with charities and give to them at levels that make other take notice. And attend events where power collects.
  • Even vacations are an opportunities to grow yourself, your business, and your network. You need to be places where other obsessed people gather.
  • Mentor up: work with a coach or someone who can take you to another level. It cant hurt to have someone else pulling for you and rooting for you and yes, even pushing you. My mentors and coaches have been invaluable to me.
  • Shop outside your reach: allowing your mind to be blown and fuel your obsession
  • Invest in education
  • Paying attention to physical health
  • Be charitable: it isnt always about giving money, it also means giving your time, energy, intelligence and inspiration. Look for problems on this planet you help with and go help.

Now that you got all the ingredients to fuel and shield your obsessions from distorted and unjustified views of others, IT’S TIME to step up your obsession game! AVERAGE IS NOT OPTION!


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